My Doll Needs The Seat More Than You

This is a typical scene AyeTaiTai faces on the train daily. She is next to the door, with a Third Trimester Baby Bump. On the Priority Seat is a primary school-aged girl with her My Little Pony playing with her doll. Her left for a few seats are a young able-bodied young man and a young lady in office wear. She staggers into the train, and no one stands up. Opposite sat a more senior lady who glares at the bump, but not offering her seat since there are more "able bodied" youngsters around. She returns to her game on her phone.

Fortunately, AyeTaiTai is getting off soon on her short MRT journey. It's sad to see such apathy, even hostility from fellow train passengers when she's finding it so hard to walk these days...

I Also Have A Baby Bump, So What?!

This morning on the train... There was a foreign worker in construction overalls in a corner seat in one cabin. He's tired and needs a break. Fine, I decided - Today shall be a "Target The Woman" day.

I approached a woman in a priority seat in the next cabin and politely asked for a seat. She stares at me suspiciously for a long time till the train doors close. Then tell me indignantly that "I'm also!". Ok, maybe you are but do you have to take that long to answer, and be so impolite about it? Not sure if you realize it, but it's certainly not obvious with your bag covering half your body. And if I were you, I would help ask the passenger next to you out of shared sympathy. After all, I'm carrying 10kg more bump than you at this moment.

So I ask the man next to her who chooses to ignore everything and stare at his phone. Once again, he takes a long time to stare at me. Hmmm... I don't think my bump is invisible at nearly 8 months? (Plus I'm holding on to it to support its size.) Then grouchily gets up. I sit down in relief and rest my aching back and churning stomach...

Why Did The Man Push A Pregnant Woman - To Get To An Arriving Train

It is the evening peak hour on at an Interchange MRT Station. I am on the downward escalator riding towards the train platform. A young man in office wear pushes me to rush to get to a train which has just arrived. The train has not even stopped, and the doors were still closed. I stumble and pushed back to correct my balance. I hold my tummy protectively in a reflex action.

He sees me, yet walks down a few steps and glares back, ready to pick a fight. Even when he reaches the bottom of the escalator, he turns back, glares and mouths something really vulgar. He was ready to turn violent anytime. It's really a challenge taking public transport in Singapore these days...

High Risk? Don't Let Others Define You

Aye Tai Tai is above "the right age" to start her family. 

And since she is relatively "older", she's been getting lots of remarks about hers being a "high risk" pregnancy and she should do this, not do that, why wait till now, etc etc etc.

However, in her many visits, a gynae - a wise gentleman with silvering hair - has never once used the term on her. In fact, to all the conditions that she brought up anxiously to him, he told her not to worry, these are "part and parcel" of a new life growing within her.

In fact, according to the Encyclopedia of Children's Health website, there is no formal or universally-accepted definition for a "high risk pregnancy". Most websites define it as one in which pre-existing conditions are present which can affect maternal or fetal health. 

Believe me, there are 1 million and 1 things to worry about during pregnancy. Especially if it's your first. There are the many physical challenges, the changes to your body, the test and test and test that you have to do, the 1001 decisions you have to make - type of delivery, hospital bed, maternity wear, baby clothes, baby furniture... (the list goes on and on, you get it). It can get extremely tiring - both physically and psychologically - and you would definitely not want to add on others' impositions to your already lengthy list.

It will be a tough journey for a few months, so let go of your fears and enjoy the journey. Trust in yourself and your own body, and take care of yourself the best way you know how to - healthy food, enough exercise, and good thoughts in your head...

Exercising For Two - Breathlessness

Although pregnant women can usually still follow along with a typical exercise program, whether it is flexibility, weight or cardio training, it is still important to remember that this is a special time in a woman's life, and training should reflect that.

As a pregnant woman, it is also important to understand what exactly happens during pregnancy. Obviously there's a lot more going on than an expanding waistline.

So it was kinda came as a "shock" when she was on her Japan Alps trip and could only walk for a few metres and felt breathless. How bad was it? It was just like the HPB advertisements of smokers who couldn't perform simple household tasks without panting.

A short stretch of a simple paved road like this at the Tateyama Snow Wall required more than ten minutes of start-stop walking. The sheltered hotel pit-stop looked like kilometres away...

And any flight of stairs look like they are halfway up the stratosphere...

Feeling breathless can be a bit scary at first. It’s also known as "air hunger" – in other words, a feeling that you’re hungry for air. Although it may make you uncomfortable at times, this type of breathlessness in pregnancy is harmless.

The amount of blood in a woman's body increases significantly during pregnancy. The heart has to pump harder to move this blood through the body and to the placenta. The increased workload on the heart can make you feel short of breath.

Throughout the nine months of your pregnancy, a woman of average weight can expect to gain around 10 kg or more. The additional weight puts added strain on the body, which causes the shortness of breath.

Later in pregnancy, your uterus pushes up against your diaphragm as your baby grows. This compresses your lungs, limiting their ability to fully expand when you take a breath and causing you to feel like you've just run a race when you're only halfway up a flight of stairs.

If your shortness of breath has started suddenly, is severe, seems to be worsening, or is associated with pain, coughing, wheezing, heart palpitations or chest tightness, seek medical advice immediately. These may be signs that something other than pregnancy alone is causing your shortness of breath.

Tips for Feeling Less Breathless

The main point is to remember that now, you are carrying a Mini Me inside yourself, so ease up on your expectations on yourself. (Yes, I know we women are always fond of bashing ourselves up.)

Walk slower, let the crowd go first, take more breaks if you have to. It's ok if you are slower, as long as you get there.

Start your exercise program from scratch. You cannot expect the same level of fitness during these nine months. You may have to include more low-intensity workouts in the meantime. Always check if you are unsure if a workout is "pregnancy-safe", and find a work-out buddy to keep you company.

Avoid carry heavy bags, and always maintain a good posture whether you are sitting or walking, to avoid additional stress on your back.

Breathing exercises will help increase your lung capacity and offer more chest breathing (as abdominal breathing is difficult due to expanding uterus).

Excessive breathing may cause dehydration. Drink enough water and avoiding diuretic beverages like coffee, tea, soda and alcohol.